Gout-riddled scrivener and Twitter maestro Dr Samuel Johnson continues to compile his dictionary for the Quietus
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Beastie Boys
Poetick Trio of the most mark’d Longevity, for they have remain’d as oafish Youths for some five-and-twenty YEARS
Bashment
Musickal Style of the Plantations: its Lyricks, Buttock-them’d Dances & Adherents are all most sympathetick to the MOLLY
‘Baby Got Back’ by Sir MixaLot
Most heart-felt Hymnal to the female Form: I favour the larger Fundament & I cannot LIE; nor can my esteem’d Brothers deny
Kate Bush
Lady-singer, consider’d as a comely Maiden & as an ethereal BANSHEE in equal Measure: most excis’d ‘pon the Topick of Miss BRONTE’S Novella
David Bowie
Thin white Troubadour who does remain at the Prow of modern Musick thro’ such ODES as Space Oddment, Gold’n Years & The Laughing HOMUNCULUS
‘Bring Your Daughter to the Slaughter’ by Iron Maiden
Shameful Tableau wherein a publick-school’d Man of fifty Years does attempt to deflower a Maiden through lewd ANALOGIE
‘Better The Devil You Know’ by Kylie
Demure Siren discover’d by Capt. COOK who dares advockate DIABOLISM through Song
Butthole Surfers
Antient Troubadours from the Texan Colonie who do delight the fashionable Americkan by assaulting the Drum & Lute whilst imbibing ETHER
‘Blue Monday’ by New Order
Lengthy Ode proving that the Towns-people of Manchester possess both Stamina & ELECTRICITY
‘The Bends’ by Radiohead
Mournful DIRGE warning of diving Maladies; perform’d by slack-ey’d Milquetoast Mister Thomas YORKE
All Writing & Ideas therein are the Creation of Mister Tom MORTON, who does write for Mister NEATE of The Quietus, yet does reserve the Right to use said Writing in divers Publickations in Future.
Follow Dr Johnson on Twitter via @DrSamuelJohnson
