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The Enemy
Streets In The Sky Neil Kulkarni , May 17th, 2012 08:30

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The new Enemy album is finally here. There it sits, being shite, in the noonday sun, attracting flies. Cross over the road my friend, ask the Lord his strength to lend, fer chrissakes don't disturb it, you know it'll start smelling worse. There's too much good stuff to spend time whining about the bad stuff, yeah? If you do whine, the bad stuff will still happen, so why worry? Console yourself - it's just the flow of cash from arsehole to arsehole - and get back to what you like. But is that a sufficient response? If wiser folk sit simply bathing in the milky plenitude of their own good taste, documents that seal the horror of the age like Streets In the Sky will simply be allowed to slip out there, venture into young minds unchallenged, perform their moves of atrophy and enfeeblement, and be passed like a virus of pisspoorness to more and more people convinced this is as good as rock can get, that this is actually music and not the second-guesswork committee-thinking pretend-pop that it is.

Even I'd leave 'em to it if they weren't such hypocritical little fuckers. A few months ago Tom Clarke, the gobshite who fronts these clowns, sneered "radio and music in general is fucking appalling at the moment. Why is nobody brave enough to make a great album? A record that can define a time? That can say what we're all thinking? Seriously?". Seriously. He said that. In comparison to The Enemy, Rebecca Black, Double Take, Cascada, people singing Bruno Mars songs into their webcams are living models of integrity. Whenever I hear Clarke quacking out his nonsense my mind goes back, back... a few years back, when I used to DJ the side-room in the Colly.

I remember when The Enemy were called Bridges and played mainly a stunningly competent, utterly tedious set of Mod covers, unnecessary blooze-gippage and generally nauseating muso-wank. They seemed to play every other week, but that could just be my mind playing tricks with exactly how interminable their pap seemed to be. What was clear to anyone who had a heart was that they were amazingly accomplished for their age, dressed rather cutely like 60s mod cut-outs and were unfailingly & stupefyingly dull. One summer, they disappeared. They came back as The Enemy, cleaned up and made as sellable as possible by Warner Bros with a shitload of stupid money, a few indie-friendly haircuts, a few hundred squids worth of sports-casual wear. The Enemy, from the start have been a total confection of grittiness, of realness, of street-level nous, and they'd have safely passed under my radar if they hadn't consistently used their Coventry 'roots' as some kind of earthy basis for their half-arsed lash-together of tedious pub-rock riffola and gnarly small town frustration.

Coventry City Council (or rather the private company CV1 that now run our town centre) were daft enough, once the Enemy had hit big, to plaster our ring-road (I pray the title of this new album is unconnected) with Clarke's face. As if us Coventrians should be proud that The Enemy have taken their lies worldwide. As if we wanted to greet each grey morn seeing this him on our way to work, and potentially before we'd even eaten breakfast. Inevitably, it took about a day before a massive spunk-spurting cock was spray-painted onto his forehead – a move seemingly un-noticed by CV1, and one that's provided a genuinely warm-fuzzy feel of civic pride every time I've driven past it since. Until recently they were set to play Cov Cathedral's ruins in a couple of weeks (Health & Safety have kiboshed it apparently and suspicions about sluggish ticket-sales are utterly unfounded, honest guv) - a fact that offended me on all kinds of levels, none of them religious.

If you want the true sound of Cov, drive the ring-road & tune into HillzFM, hear loony Nigerian church services, shitloads of drum & bass, dubstep, reggae and the odd bit of Ukrainian/Polish/Italian and Irish music, hear the WHOLE of Cov, not just the particularly rancid corners of whiteboy-schmindie that still persist. On the Enemy's FB-page they talk about things 'going-off Wood End style': for anyone who actually lives in and knows Coventry, these blatantly misinformed attempts to tie themselves in with some perception of Coventry ruffneckness are just plain embarrassing, suggest that they've never actually been out and about in the city. If they were, if they listened, they'd realise that most of us are ASHAMED the Enemy come from Coventry, and skirt over it in polite conversation with a slight wrinkle of the nose. On behalf of Coventry's good, kindly, normally abnormal people, I cast thee Enemy OUT. Excommunicated to Bubbenhall. No, that's too cruel. Let's make it Meriden.

They've never sounded better. Seriously. The Bronx's Joby Ford has found them a big blustery wide thump to inhabit, a state-of-the-art faux-rawness that sounds like the Foo Fighters at their most lucrative, QOTSA at their crossover-worst, Biffy Clyro at their most insufferably Biffy Clyro. The fact that The Enemy have populated this surefire money-making template with songs so laughably under-developed, half-arsed and unconvincing almost makes you pity the little pricks – opener 'Gimme The Sign' pitches the usual utterly predictable sub-Oasis rawk-plod against lyrics so knuckle-bitingly bad ("He's walking like a penguin / All zipped up tight / He's acting like he's Tupac / But he's never even seen a gun") you wonder how he's gonna top it on the rest of the album. (Don't worry, he does. Repeatedly.)

The single 'Saturday' follows through like a worryingly moist bottom-brap. ("Frosty milkman in the morning / Desperate breakfast in a boring town". Desperate breakfast? What, really? Surely 'forlorn fry-up' or 'Wearisome Weetabix' would've scanned better, n'est ce pas?) You finally realise, The Enemy aren't actually making music anymore, if they ever did. They're arranging sound in ways to make money from people who have bought previous arrangements of sound they've been responsible for. Even when The Enemy try and write a pop-song, they come out with what they always come out with - stodgy waddling rock songs of quite staggering insipidity, rock that's been mushed up to the consistency of gruel. When they go soft on the Roxette-esque 'Like a Dancer' and Travis-lite 'Two Kids' it's actually a blessed relief from the gurning sweatiness that surrounds it, like a squirt of Oust into a festival latrine.

Overwhelmingly though, the 'freshness' and 'rawness' The Enemy have been mooting about this record (rather hilariously, they've been moaning that their second album was "too political") rapidly becomes a horrific variety of platinum-punk indecision, sound somewhere gullet-ticklingly between Stereophonics and Starsailor on the truly gross 'Turn It On' and 'This Is Real'. It's lumpenly undanceable on the none-more-unfunky 'Get Up & Dance'. Turn and tilt your head for a moment while The Enemy are playing and a splat of something revolting falls out of your ear, apologises, squirms away and out the door squeaking. This is what happens when you reheat vomit, when the coprophage feeds from the coprophage. Speaking of which...

As Streets In The Sky malodourously unfolds towards its expiration you actually start feeling a little bit sorry for 'em. A little bit. Pity The Enemy, so young, and yet so soon confronting the limits of their dunderheaded imaginations. Warner Bros have pulled out now, and this 'comeback' record is make or break, but from the off, bands like The Enemy made a fatal mistake, have a fundamental misunderstanding of what music is, what makes music great. This generation of lad-rock wannabes all have the fatal flaw inherent in this sham masquerade. Music is all muscle-memory to them – the idea that if you do this to a guitar, if you do this to a bass, if you do this to a drum kit, all these things you've seen others do, what will come out will be 'great' 'proper' music.

Quotes for the posters? "A blazing return to form". Yup, Streets In The Sky certainly slips neatly and melts beautifully into the big bowl of mouldywank the Enemy have already given us. A little spikier perhaps (there are moments here that rock as hard as Kim Wilde & Billy Idol) but that's just all the better to snag your 'phagus on the way back up. These songs are so dreary they're like the distilled essence of Adrian Chiles' voice made into barres and guitar-tabs, your time escaping forever down the black hole of its tedium. Quotes for you lot? No, you don't want this in your house. Try to avoid all media that might accidentally send this sonic turd up the u-bend of your day. One last quote for the posters - "AS GOOD AS IT GETS: MAKES YOU PROUD TO BE BRITISH. QUALITY. CLASS. TOP. MINT. LEGENDS. GOOD LUCK TO 'EM" - before a quote for The Enemy themselves: rot in bargain bins forever you twats. Although I have a horrible feeling it won't be, I pray and fervently hope this record is your last. You'll find me in Coventry if you want to take this up with me. Have you ever been?

tenbenson
May 17, 2012 11:41am

bwahahaha!

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zahid fayyaz
May 17, 2012 11:48am

Don't hold back. What do you really think?

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May 17, 2012 12:01pm

You didn't like it then.

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tim
May 17, 2012 12:35pm

Wonderful review.

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Dan B
May 17, 2012 2:30pm

Best piece of music writing I've read in years.

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Symon Dunford
May 17, 2012 3:41pm

If only this could have been written about them around the time of their first album, back when they actually had fans! Still a great piece of writing though, Kulkarni is not a man to be crossed! Would have more effect if it was printed in NME though; I mean, I doubt there are many Quietus readers who actually listen to The Enemy....

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May 17, 2012 3:43pm

not just saying this because of yesterday, but what an utter load of knee-jerk in-crowd, sneery, hateful wank this is. 'Lad rock', god, I wish people would stop using that term.

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May 17, 2012 3:56pm

Sheer brilliance. You made some seriously good points.

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Harry Sword
May 17, 2012 4:28pm

Pow! And I really wanna hear Hillz FM now

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Richard
May 17, 2012 5:32pm

In reply to Symon Dunford:

I listened to them age 17; went to see them live, realised that they weren't that great in retrospect.

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Harry Josef Wright
May 17, 2012 5:54pm

In reply to Harry Sword:

Spot on

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Gareth
May 17, 2012 7:03pm

Truly excellent review. I have weekly arguments with a colleague at work who thinks The Enemy are 'proper decent'. They're not, they are a nadir.

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1
May 17, 2012 7:47pm

Not really a review is it? Just an opportunity to spout an existing hatred?

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Defer baker
May 17, 2012 9:20pm

This review is about as boring as the enemy are. Firstly it is overlong and bloated allowing what appears to be some sort of personal Coventry mafia thing to rise to the top. Secondly it's taking potshots at an easy target and sometimes not for the right reasons. The Beatles used to be a covers band and 'ugly' people are allowed to make music too. Criticise them for the right reasons if you must and try to keep it within a paragraph or two. Next week, Kasabian and Mumford and Sons right?

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May 17, 2012 9:34pm

It actually reads like a rant from an internet forum. Insults, talk of nazis and a spurious fact taken from wikipedia. neither pleasant or pleasing. Not up to standard quietus!

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OI! OI!
May 17, 2012 10:05pm

Top Bantz Neil. LAD!

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Tim Russell
May 18, 2012 2:34am

As a fellow Coventrian, I salute you Mr Kulkarni. These arsewipes are an embarrassment to our city. "Inevitably, it took about a day before a massive spunk-spurting cock was spray-painted onto his spotty forehead – a move seemingly un-noticed by CV1, and one that's provided a genuinely warm-fuzzy feel of civic pride every time I've driven past it since". Classic.

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May 18, 2012 12:40pm

Before you all start revelling in congratulatory snobbery, realise this "reviewer" has stooped to a level that serves only to promote a negativity that obviously consumes him beyond his better judgement. It falls way short of being a credible piece of writing and really is abhorently hateful to the point where it reads not as piece of music journalism, but as the ramblings of a person whose self gratifying, foul mouthed eagerness to be heard has taken centre stage. Uninformative and unnecessary.

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Stavros P. Leibowitz
May 18, 2012 1:31pm

In reply to :

See - now here's a thing: criticism and journalism are two very different things. Criticism is about passing judgment - usually on the aesthetic qualities of the subject under discussion. Journalism concerns itself with news and factual matters. This being the case, this review is perfectly sound. What would you prefer? Reading about what the songs sound like? If that's what you're after then go and read Amazon's reader reviews.

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Ronnie
May 18, 2012 1:38pm

Taking a wild guess here but I bet you're a failed musician from Coventry...just a wild guess. Oh and you're probably shit in bed too. And ugly.

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Dan B
May 18, 2012 2:10pm

In reply to :

If a man can't hope that a plane crashes into The Enemy's practice room then terrorism has won.

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Leigh Urquhart
May 18, 2012 3:01pm

Neil Kulkarni at his vitriolic best. Having read this yesterday, twice, I had to come back and read it again today. "Desperate breakfast? What, really? Surely 'forlorn fry-up' or 'Wearisome Weetabix' would've scanned better, n'est ce pas?" Indeed.

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May 18, 2012 3:49pm

Just to play devils advocate, here's the reviewers band he's the singer. They are called The moonbears from Coventry also.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eiLR48zMXJk&feature=youtube_gdata_player

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May 18, 2012 5:28pm

Jealousy is a terrible thing. Still bitter your little band never quite made it?

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Neil Kulkarni
May 18, 2012 6:13pm

jealous? of the enemy? bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha bwahahahahaha

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Neil Kulkarni
May 18, 2012 6:21pm

Sorry, that tickled me but re: jealousy, band not making it, ugly, no good in bed etc - no I'm not jealous of the Enemy's success, propped as it has been on the adoration of dimwits like youz, my band is something I love and enjoy doing and that's all that matters to me + I'm actually very pretty and a great shag.

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Neil Kulkarni
May 18, 2012 6:32pm

Oh, and the 'every journalist is a failed musician' angle is so tired, hackneyed and untrue I can't believe it's being repeated in 2012. A bit like the Enemy's music really . . . I've been writing since 94 and didn't join a band until manymanymany years later.

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May 19, 2012 10:37am

You're better than this Neil. And so are they to be fair. That's all.

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Neil Kulkarni
May 19, 2012 11:11am

I can assure you, I'm not better than this.

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May 19, 2012 11:38am

In reply to Neil Kulkarni:

Nice to see I annoyed you enough to get a response, seeing as that's all pompous bullshit like your review is after - it says as much on your FB page. As for me liking The Enemy, where exactly have I stated that? Don't let your guesswork get in the way of your any reply will you? Your write-up is nothing more than a completely over-the-top, pretentious bag-o-shite write-up, clearly aimed at winning kiss-arse comments off those that would rather slate than celebrate one of the few things to make it outside the ring-road area of Coventry recently. And if you would care to re-read that sentence, nowhere does it state I like them, I just appreciate the fact they're having a go. Maybe the album just needs a gimmick to win such cynics over? Maybe The Enemy should resort to giving away lollipops as a marketing ploy? Maybe not, as it's been done before, and never worked last time either. Or maybe if they want positive reviews from people closer to where they live they should try going out with a journalist? That should guarantee them some positive column inches, as that has worked before. I've seen your bands, and you're not all that. As for you being a great shag, I'm surprised anybody gets close enough to find out, as you seem so far up your own arse I'm surprised anybody can get that close to you.

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May 19, 2012 1:45pm

Lengthy bile spitting review? Quote from Spinal Tap? Compares hapless indie band with REAL music from Ver streets? Allusions to class and race? It is 1995 and I'm reading the NME. Mind you, the music sounds like it could have been from then as well.

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kimsquirt
May 19, 2012 4:28pm

King of the haters, Neil Kulkarni, has had such a rotten life that he invariably goes for the cheap shot every time someone lets him write a review for no money. It’s no wonder the Melody Maker stopped selling and went down. Those hacks with a modicum of talent managed to hang onto the life raft that was the NME but they didn’t want Kulkarni, who writes like Swells but with all the funny bits taken out. Kulkarni is a sneery intransigent blowhard, convinced that he is the last honest writer with any integrity and droning on about the lack of authenticity in rock music. Who gives a shit about the Enemy? Not me. But after reading this review I'm going to mortgage my house and sell my children to the nearest brothel so I can go and buy up as many Enemy records possible -

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Neil Kulkarni
May 19, 2012 4:44pm

In reply to kimsquirt:

Hats off Kimsquirt that's all lovely, especially the highlarious bit about selling yr kids to a brothel but should point out - I have never had, or claimed to have, any integrity

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John Tatlock
May 19, 2012 4:48pm

I'm a bit puzzled by the suggestion, a couple of posts back, that class and race are some boring thing from last decade that don't bear discussion any more.

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Neil Kulkarni
May 19, 2012 5:13pm

Columbo voice: "Just one more thing" - "It’s no wonder the Melody Maker stopped selling and went down. Those hacks with a modicum of talent managed to hang onto the life raft that was the NME but they didn’t want Kulkarni, who writes like Swells but with all the funny bits taken out." Ummm, sorry n all that but I didn't try and get a job at the NME, I went to Metal Hammer, DJ, Bang, Bizarre, Touch, Spin, Uncut, Kerrang, Terrorizer, Plan B, Careless Talk etc etc i.e I carried on freelancing as I had through my time at the Maker. Although you're probably right, the NME wouldn't have had me though from what I remember of our phone conversations Swells loved my writing. Like I say, sorry about a few boring facts getting in the way of your post Kimsquirt, cos I genuinely genuinely enjoyed it.

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May 20, 2012 2:31am

In reply to Neil Kulkarni:

Neil, you are many things but I would never accuse you being funny.

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May 20, 2012 10:29am

If Neil kulkarni had a quid for every hate filled bitter comment he made, he would maybe have enough to convince himself he had made a career out of music journalism. Sadly not. Good hobby for him though. Check out his band. They are really interesting and experimental. Kind of like a middle aged college band.

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Duane Helger
May 20, 2012 1:24pm

I like the lengths that the people who disagree with this review go to when surely a simple 'your mother' or 'so's your face' would suffice. But what can you expect from ugly people with no life and no friends and no bed lolz

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mark e
May 20, 2012 9:38pm

fuckin' genius.

john doran vs kanye west

vs

neil k vs the enemy

the connection : the quietus.

stuff like this makes me so proud my name is buried deep in this sites archive.

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JDB
May 20, 2012 9:51pm

People in glass houses shouldn't throw bricks;

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ES4MAqpyuB4

Your band is positively sub-Magic Numbers!

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Defer baker
May 21, 2012 1:38am

What I find funny is how i thought 'he 'sounds like he's in that bitter local band from 'killing bono' and then I come back on here and it looks like just that! What I will say is this though, your band are actually pretty good, you should stick to that instead of this tripe writing. I used to love swells, but your review is like the longest embarrssing drunk text message I have ever read.

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Dances With Fools
May 21, 2012 12:57pm

Without any doubt, the most ineptly written 'review' I have ever had the painful misfortune to stumble across.

Wake up, little man.
Using lots of adjectives does not make you smart!
Nor does it make your 'arguments' (in the loosest sense of the term) any more valid.

In fact, it actually makes us all acutely aware that you are OVER-COMPENSATING for something.... ....an actual point.

I'm not yet sure which is more unpalatable: your biased, predictable and childish review, or the cretins excreting their opinions the comments section who apparently think your meandering drivel is well worded.

I call you out, fraud.

Put away your Christmas cracker thesaurus and write something with depth. Or just die in a fire. Either would suffice.

And as a side note, The Enemy are indeed 'shite'. I'll concede that to you at least.

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John A.
May 21, 2012 3:01pm

I agree with you but lay off Billy Idol, he rocked hard.

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Els
May 21, 2012 4:12pm

Truly excellent review, especially the description of one of the songs as 'a worryingly moist bottom brap'. I'm just checking out the album now to see if Kulkarni's bile is merited - seems so. Tedious, generic pap.

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JOHNNY MANGO
May 21, 2012 6:00pm

In reply to Dances With Fools:

Oh no it's "bias", is it?

I'm glad... don't think I could stomach more limp-dick NME 'objectivity'. Can't think of anything worse than an objective music review. All music reviews are embellishment. If they weren't they'd merely detail grey scales, logistical fret-playing and note-marked crescendos.

I don't want thick, indie-twerp contextualised beige-mouth-pebbles. I require humanism. Not post-modern wikipedia chip paper.

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Rob braviner
May 21, 2012 6:17pm

Why does anyone read stupid reviews like this, listen to your own opinions? What a twisted peice of crap, the reason the enemy are good is because that write songs about real working class issues that people can relate too. Il admit the last album wasnt very good but the title was important, music for the people, its from the perspective of the modern self deprecating, self asteim-less working class writen by lads who have who have had these experiences and ave something to say about it, the only difference between tom and the boys is they have a mic and guitars to put there views through instead of talking about it in the pub with friend like the rest of us do. These boys come from a "forgotten generation" in this country, hence there following of 16 to 25 yr olds, this review is clearly writen by someone who shares nothing with a the enemy audience so would be best advised to keep his nose out of a subject i dont care what your thoughts are about.

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HMJ
May 22, 2012 8:30am

True Cov - Andy used to 'hang out' down the ramp in Kenilworth when we were wee whipper snappers - Wood End my arse!... And Rob (above), this means they're not working class!

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tenbenson
May 22, 2012 9:11am

looks like the enemy's "anonymous" street team have hijacked the thread...

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AndyP
May 22, 2012 11:16am

what bitter/twisted/pompous "Journalism". why get so personal? The enemy have a UK NO.1 album, top ten singles, which is alot more that you will ever achieve

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Defer Baker
May 22, 2012 11:17am

In reply to tenbenson:

I think that's what you would like to think but there are plenty of us here who have admitted to not liking the enemy (we are quietus readers for goodness sakes!). We simply don't like Neil's review either.

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james m lang
May 22, 2012 11:56am

In reply to tenbenson:

If it is the Enemy's street team, then why is the writing so much better, more perceptive, funny and dangerous than Kulkarni's ?

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Stavros P. Leibowitz
May 22, 2012 12:59pm

In reply to AndyP:

Westlife have had loads more No 1 albums and singles than The Enemy but does that make 'em any good? Though now that I think about it, I've seen Westlife and The Enemy live and I have to say, the Irish lads were far the more entertaining of the two.

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May 22, 2012 1:52pm

Few years too late with this one I think.

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tenbenson
May 22, 2012 2:10pm

In reply to Defer Baker:

well as you identified yourself, you're not who i'm talking about. usually the angry ones aren't quietus readers but people looking for a review on google that are directed here. not that there's anything wrong with that of course, but they sometimes seem to have a sense of humour deficiency.

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tenbenson
May 22, 2012 2:11pm

In reply to AndyP:

i love this argument

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tenbenson
May 22, 2012 2:14pm

In reply to james m lang:

you're right. fans of the enemy are amazing.

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SONNY PALOOKA
May 23, 2012 10:42am

these enemy guys are undoubtedly total shit eating cock sucking twats of the highest lowest magnitude, but this review's embararrasing personal view on whats supposedly hip + cool in COVENTRY is totally puketacular . and yes it does sound like a member of the self appointed coventry cool crowd moaning that some shit they think is cool, which no doubt sucks equally as bad as these guys didnt make it :(

also love the irony how you write at the start "theres too much good stuff to spend time whining about shit stuff" then spend 10 paragraphs doing exactly that. dont you even pay attention to your own horse shit?

also as shit as the enemy's bullshit paul weller (who himself is a dick but i digress...) impressions are, your craptacular karaoke efforts are every bit as bad haha . the reason the failed music writers cliche is so prevelant is because well, it seems to be true, almost without fail. The awesome thing nowadays is we can see your embarasing youtube clips too

ps cant stress this point enough : nobody gives a fuck whats supposedly hip in coventry

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John
May 23, 2012 12:27pm

I agree. I can't stand the enemy, but Kulkarni's sorry excuse for a band are little better. A Forever Changes cover version, never heard that done before....

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Your Enemy
May 25, 2012 10:47am

'Lad rock', god, I wish people would stop making that music.

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Your Enemy
May 25, 2012 11:05am

In reply to james m lang:

But it's not, really, is it? Go back up a couple of posts and try reading Rob Braviner's post without wincing or squirming. At least Kulkarni can PUNCTUATE.

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tomclarkespussfilledspots
May 25, 2012 11:10am

Best review ever. He reviewed it. His opinion. And that of many many folk around. You want to hear someone wanking over it, stick to the NME, if you can read with The Enemy's halls dangling in your eyeline. Oh, and wipe your mouths, I can still see some semen.

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May 25, 2012 11:14am

My guess is all of the comments that disapprove of this review are actually the band members of The Enemy posing as several different people. I can't imagine they actually have any fans.

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diesel d diesel
May 25, 2012 5:16pm

In reply to kimsquirt:

do you squirt?

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Z
May 27, 2012 3:04pm

Thanks so much for this, just like to say as another coventry person that it's bang on the money.

The real problem with these guys - aside from the quality issue - is their affectation of an authentic 'working class' coventry identity that's about as real as a themed pub in disneyland.

As has already been said, these guys come from around the kenilworth road (take a look on street view and tell me that looks proletarian with a straight face), between earlsdon and styvchale, the two richest areas in the city. Two of them went to finham, the 'good' middle class comp that has spent the last fifteen years trying to look as private as it can get away with (academy now I think).

The 'going-off Wood End style' comment is hugely telling: it's an instance of the discourse about 'townies'/the main city among the richer kids in these areas. Places like Wood End, Hillfields, Stoke are spoken of like areas on the map marked 'here be dragons'. Sod all relation to the actual areas, which they'd never go to outside of a school geography trip.

That the band tries a kind of mock, stereotyped 'identification' with these mythical townies rather than plain snobbery is just another way of not relating to the actual people who live in town (one you'll find among the labour-ish households in earlsdon - the tory twats are honest, though I think we export them to warwickshire. generally earlsdoners have the bizarre idea they're the plebeians, compared to... people in leamington).

They've been taken up by the cv1-council complex to 'represent' the city precisely because they don't really represent it - they fit the anodyne business regime of mutton, the tories and whoever the fuck it is who actually owns the city nowadays. That lot think they do resonate because basically they're like their own kids!

The saddest part is that the city once did have a real group to be proud of - the specials - which which united white and black people, whereas from a look at this lot you would't think a black or asian coventry even existed!

(Finally, I can't recommend HillzFM enough. I think it's up for streaming somewhere, check it out.)

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Kulkarni's illegitimate love child
May 28, 2012 9:16pm

Er I thought I would read this 'review' to find out what the new record was like, not to hear some muppet ranting off for 10 minutes about some grudge from years ago. What's up mate? Catch one of those scally's shagging your girlfriend back then did you?

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Jun 1, 2012 10:38am

What an arse wipe.This guy with a great british name thinks we all want to listen to crap hip hop and computer generated music.These guys are from Coventry so let them be proud of that fact and let them carry on what they are doing which is having fun and providing brilliant live music.
They will be the top attraction at the summer festivals because they interact with the crowd and are fucking loud and don't worry about what million doller trailer they will be staying in.
This country is in a crappy situation where we are being ripped off left right and center and as soon as someone speaks out about it pricks like you slag them off.
I am 43 years old and i love this music and you talk about being from Coventry,when was the last time you went and supported your local football team(cov city) in their hour of need.
Yeh probably never so do us all a favour and piss of.

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John Doran
Jun 1, 2012 10:41am

In reply to :

I wondered how long it would be until this descended into racism. Also, nice use of the American spelling of centre.

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Dr Meadowduck Raspberry
Jun 2, 2012 12:00am

Classic neil Kulkarni! I've just remembered the only reason I used to still but melody maker in its flagging years. Please never stop writing. Btw I don't come from Coventry and I don't think I've heard a song by the enemy either!

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Sebastienne Hharfff
Jul 2, 2012 10:44pm

'the reason the enemy are good is because that write songs about real working class issues that people can relate too.'
Like lack of English language classes and access too basic spelling? If I had my way they would be gassed like badgers.

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Sam
Jul 15, 2012 5:57pm

Wrong, Great band

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Jul 30, 2012 11:30pm

Review the music. Not the fact you're more "Cov" then they are.

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dave
Sep 15, 2013 6:41pm

I am from Kenilworth, a middle class town next to Coventry. So are 2/3's of the enemy! They are NOT from Coventry! The singer is from Coventry but from the wealthiest area in the city. They are not working class lads!!! The writer explains that they were a mod covers band until they disappeared one summer...'They came back as The Enemy, cleaned up and made as sellable as possible by Warner Bros with a shitload of stupid money, a few indie-friendly haircuts, a few hundred squids worth of sports-casual wear.' They were manufactured; this is the most important point the article makes. The Enemy were stars when they were promoted, but since they have been dropped the dumb masses have lost interest

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