It has emerged that British Prime Minister David Cameron gave world leaders in Northern Ireland for the recent G8 summit a USB stick filled with some of the most appalling music our fair nation has produced in recent times.

Featured were bizarrely popular indie scruffs Alt-J; Nottingham's Bob Dylan, Jake Bugg; warbling mini-Keane Tom Odell, and Birdy's 'Skinny Love', not about lattes or a predilection for the thin, but a Bon Iver cover. Cripes, jivens & helpmaboab! What a soundtrack for Barack Obama and Vladimir Putin when they sat on the hotel toilet trying to squeeze out that air travel induced turd!Laura Mvula was on there too, which must have provided sweet and blessed relief... did Angela Merkel weep? Did she? Full tracklist below.

The news that our Prime Minister is not only shafting the nation with his vile policies, but also making us look like the kind of music hating bellends who think that taking a few days off from Foxtons to go and LOL around in a paint fight at Secret Garden Party makes them look 'edgy' on Instagram, was discovered by Twitter user Dan Williams, who sent a public information request.

Alt-J – 'Tessellate'

Jake Bugg – 'Lightning Bolt'

Laura Mvula – 'Green Garden'

Lianne La Havas – 'Is Your Love Big Enough?'

Ben Howard – 'Only Love'

Gabrielle Aplin – 'Home'

Tom Odell – 'Another Love'

Rudimental ft John Newman – 'Feel The Love'

Birdy – 'Skinny Love'

Conor Maynard – 'Can't Say No'