Breakfast of Champions

How do you make a film out of a book in which the omniscient third person narrator describes life in suburban america to you as if you're a space tourist who has thus far been ignorant of human customs, racism, modern technology and most bodily functions, then becomes self aware and inserts itself into the story and begins influencing events? Well, you start by casting Bruce Willis in the lead role. Maybe this is what killed Kurt Vonnegut.